Our 12 Days of Yule...

Okay so we aren't through our full 12 days yet but we usually try to celebrate as many as we can or as many as Dave's schedule allows for. We always kick it off by letting the kids open their first present on the Solstice or sometimes the Eve of as the case was this year since Dave had the day off. The kids don't get a lot of gifts from us but we try to let them open the ones from us on days we won't be gathering with other friends or family.

The kids and I spent the 22nd with friends while Dave went to a movie with my brother. I wish I would have gotten pictures from that night since it was such fun for all and such a wonderful addition to our holidays. But alas we were too busy enjoying our evening for me to remember to pick up a camera.

Dave had the 23rd off so we had our own intimate Christmas with the kids. They opened the remainder of their gifts from us and the ones their Grandma from AZ sent in the mail.

I love that my tripod allowed us to get a picture from that night. We finished it off as we always do with Dave's nights off in Dec... curled up on the couch watching a Christmas special.

Christmas Eve we drove up north to my Aunt's house for Christmas with my Dad's side of the family. Ozzye made friends with my uncle Steve... well he made friends with just about everyone but this was the only picture I got.

My Grandma was actually there this year for Christmas which is an extra special treat since she usually leaves for FL before the first snow fall. So naturally I had to seize the opportunity to get a generation picture.

All the kids with MY cousins. My Dad's baby sister and I had kids about the same time so the kids always get confused as to who's cousins they really are... but I guess it is all the same anyway.

Their silly faces... I wish they got along...

Christmas Day was spent at my brother's this year which was also extra special with them moving back this year. We have rarely seen them in the past over the holidays with them being so far away so what family on my mom's side that could make it came down to celebrate with us.

Ozzye and my brother, Brian... He was singing to him.

Grandma with most of her Great-Grandkids (just my two cousin's kids were missing)...

My parents with all of their Grandchildren. It was SO nice to have a good old fashion Christmas with all the family together again!

Ozzye fast asleep Christmas night...

Gage getting his snuggle time in...

Look who woke up....

Aubriel and Brody sleeping in the new tent Santa brought...

I just felt like Kain needed his picture taken... he however did not...

Tonight we had our Christmas with Dave's Dad and Step-Mom. I feel so blessed to have so much family near by to surround my children with. I hope they grow up with fond memories of this time of year.

Yes, I took several but somehow this was the best I got...

This was taken Christmas night at my brother's but I think it is one of my new favorites. It seems like the camera is so rarely turned on Dave and I especially when we are simply enjoying the moments life brings us. I cherish these memories caught in a photo. As if I need to be reminded of how very lucky I am to have such a wonderful person to love and that loves me so completely but it is nice to still have.

I am so incredibly blessed with my husband and children, friends and family! We certainly enjoyed and loved all of them we got to see these past few days and missed and remembered those we didn't.

We look forward to what the next year has in store for us and can't wait to meet this newest tiny blessing that will be gracing us in about 3 months!

6 week belly growth...

Since my last pregnancy update was when I had just hit 20 weeks I thought I would post some more recent photos. Unfortunately the only growth I really notice that is visible would be the bulge hanging over the BACK of my pants rather than the front. But I have started to waddle now and baby is certainly stretching the limits of the inside of my belly for certain so it must be expanding in some capacity.

I continue to struggle with getting my belly measurements just right. I did not measure nearly as much with Ozzye as I did with this one, which is hard to believe since it seemed liked I measured a ton with him. I think I measured quite a bit with him simply because I was in awe of the measurements I was getting compared to the first four babies.

Now I measure in hopes to gain insight. Like cracking a code or something. I just want to get it right! With Oz I measured myself over by about 3cm a lot until my midwife helped me figure out what I was doing wrong. She got me closer to 1.5-2 cm over my weeks which was still on the large side for me but not crazy large.

Ozzye's pregnancy size and birth weight certainly solidified the fact that measurements don't really mean anything. I consistently measured 1.5-2 cm ahead and he came out my smallest at 6# 5oz. But in the interest of tracking a pregnancy in some way, since I am pretty low key anyway, it is suppose to be more accurate than an ultrasound guess. Of course I think Oz proved that one wrong as well so maybe it just all really means nothing in the end.

So far I have gotten the measurements as followed:

20 weeks - 21 cm

22 weeks - 24 cm

24 weeks - 27 cm

26 weeks - 30 cm

Although with that being said a couple of my friends recently measured me at 27 and 28 cm over this last weekend... and they probably have about as good of a idea of what they are doing as I do. 27-28 would certainly be in my normal range with Ozzye albeit large for the average woman... but I suppose there is nothing average about me and my pregnancies at this point. So either they are far better at this stuff than I am, maybe one can't measure themselves accurately? Or I am am growing at a rapid rate...

The heartbeat continues to be fast but I of course don't have any numbers since I only use a fetoscope. And I am starting to be able to make out the head and butt floating around in there which is always fun... well fun for me, I'm not quite sure how much the baby enjoys being poked at.

A couple more weeks and we will be in the home stretch. I can't believe how fast this pregnancy is flying by!

Two Holidays Since Last Blog Post!

I know that's pretty bad... We celebrated both Thanksgiving and St. Nick's day and not only did I not post about them but I didn't get a single picture from either. I really, really enjoy Thanksgiving aside from the fact my birthday ALWAYS falls within days of it and let's face it, holidays make people far to busy for birthday fun. But I think the reason why I didn't get any pictures has more to do with the fact we didn't really go anywhere or see much family. As usual we had my parents over for dinner and then later in the evening my brother and his family stopped by. It was a good day though enjoyed by all and I think this year we are extra Thankful for all that we have.

I did however get pictures of us going to cut down our Christmas tree! It has become one of our most cherished traditions! We longed to do it so many years when the older boys were little but with Dave's work schedule and then the kids being in school we just rarely found time to fit it in. But a few years ago we found a place not far from GB, which is open during the week and all their trees are the same price. Which is a must for Dave since he hates walking around looking at tree after tree trying to figure out which one will cost him the least when he says by nature I will unknowingly fall in love with the most expensive. County H tree farm is the sweetest place by far we have visited. Owned by a little old couple with a log cabin that they give away free hot chocolate to the kids, it just screams holiday warmth!

Here are the kids running through the trees, looking for just the right one...

Gage freezing...

Here is the one they settled on! It is BIG!

Their favorite part of the trip and probably one of my favorite shots of the season. We let them ride in back through the grounds to the cabin.

Back at the cabin....

Having hot cocoa while Daddy secures the tree on the truck...

All ready to go!

Finished, decorated tree!

Then last week we went to visit Santa and Mrs. Clause at my mom's work. We have gone every year since Kain was first born. Brody went first. Very excited but a bit too nervous to make eye contact....

Ozzye took one look at Brody sitting on Santa's lap and decided it was NOT the thing for him...

He was fond of Mrs. Clause however...

Probably because she gave him a bag of candy and didn't look quite as intimidating...

Kain chatting with his old friend...

Aubriel on the other hand was mesmerized and didn't take her eyes off of him once...

Gage with Santa...

After every one else was done my mom told Ozzye I would like a picture of him with Santa and he didn't bat an eye at crawling up on his lap. I think he might be getting use to this whole picture taking thing.

Then since we went with my Brother and his family we needed one of Grandma with all the grand kids!

Half Way!

Yesterday I was officially 20 weeks pregnant! It seemed in many ways to just fly by as I'm sure the next few months will as well, at least until after the new year is over. I was thinking that my belly growth stayed about the same but most of my friends still seem to think I look big in comparison to their belly size at 20 weeks. I am measuring on the larger side for most at 21.5 cm but still within normal range and about the same as what I did with Ozzye... so I guess I'm right on schedule for me after having five already.

I have started gathering things for the birth and have given up my idea of a destination/vacation birth after Dave decided driving back with 6 kids one being a newborn kind of sounded like a nightmare... which I suppose I have to agree with. Although the thought of having another baby come in the winter in a house that has yet to feel like our own, after Ozzye's warm spring day birth at our last house, is not the least bit appealing to me. Cuddling in by a warm fire with my fresh new babe snuggled up to my breast and my husband and other children surrounding us is starting to sound very appealing. So another birth at home it is no matter where our home happens to be.

The children's anticipation is growing every day along with my belly. Brody asks me almost daily how many days it is until the baby comes out and tells me often how he just can't wait to see it. Most often he tells me it is a girl baby. I think Gage might be the only child, aside from Ozzye of course that doesn't express much interest in it, that doesn't care if we have another boy or not. The rest are all crossing their fingers for a girl. I wish I could offer up some insight as to any feelings I have on the subject but I honestly have none. I think I have purchased more girl items but I don't really attribute that to a feeling as much as the fact all my girl items are summer things since Aubriel was born in June and I of course lack for nothing in the boy department. If I am surprised with another girl I would at least like a few girly things to put her in... at least until everyone else goes shopping for her, ha, ha.

For now our biggest challenge is settling on a couple of names... which always seems to be the biggest challenge for Dave and I. As usual we have middle names picked out for both sexes and a few first names we are throwing around. Our usual once again... his favorite, my favorite and the names neither one of us loves but we could maybe live with. How I long to be one of those couples that can easily settle on baby names. But I suppose we have much more interesting stories changing our kids names when they are a month old. At least we have another 20 weeks to decide and hopefully that will be enough time. If not we will have a nameless baby for a month because I will NOT go through the process of changing it's name again!

Baby Update, Pumpkin Carving, Halloween, Samhain oh my!

I hit 18 weeks on Wednesday! I can't believe I am almost to the half way mark... of course if I go early when there will be a full moon in March I could be half way now. I am not noticing a ton of belly growth the last few weeks but baby must be getting bigger since on Friday I was able to hear the heartbeat for the first time!Now I know you are probably thinking that I should have heard that already but we no longer use dopplers to listen to the heartbeat. After reading far too much controversy over them being just as bad (if not worse viewed by some) as ultrasound I just don't see the point when I know if I wait a few weeks longer I can just hear it with the fetoscope. After all the heartbeat doesn't tell you much this early on and considering I could see my belly growing and could feel baby moving I think it is safe to assume it had a heartbeat. Even with my first two babies my Dr. wouldn't use a doppler before the 2nd trimester and would often use a fetoscope after 20 weeks which was pretty cool in my opinion. You rarely see MD taking those kind of natural precautions!

But anyway back to the heartbeat. I was surprised to hear it this early though since with Ozzye I didn't find his until I was almost 22 weeks along. I honestly wasn't expecting much when I sat down with my fetoscope on Friday but there it was, clear as day! It is such a sweet sound so I don't blame other mamas for wanting to hear it as soon as possible. Ozzye did come out a little peanut though so maybe he wasn't big enough when I was 18 weeks with him. Or maybe my placenta was in the way, it was up very high with Oz. Or maybe I just didn't quite know what I was looking for.... although it isn't like I had never heard a baby heartbeat before. But whatever the reason I won't complain, I loved finding it just after 18 weeks!

Sat. night after Dave got home from work we carved our pumpkins. It was much later than we usually do. I think Dave was hoping we could skip it all together but that would just be silly.Dave put the bright idea in Kain's head that he and the other kids should go as Kiss this year. Brody didn't care, Aubriel really wanted to do it, Kain was thrilled and Gage... well Gage was talked into it only to change his mind just a few nights before. So our Peter Criss left the band......to become a hippy. Ozzye was suppose to go as Ozzy Osborn but we never were able to find round sun glasses for him. So due to a lack of anything else to wear he got to wear his black coat with the infamous cows pants and hat of Kain's. Dave and I came up with a list of things he could have been going as but nothing was overly appropriate for a 2 year to be for Halloween.This was suppose to be the kids group picture but Ozzye ran off. I found the picture to be completely hysterical though. I think it might be my favorite from Halloween this year.
And now that all my little ones are tucked in fast asleep from their sugar comas I can quietly celebrate Samhain. It is the Pagan new year and a perfect time to reflect on that last year's lessons and blessings. I tend to become rather introverted anyway when I am pregnant so this is the perfect season to gestate a new life.

I wish I could write all about how this year was better than the year before but that just isn't actually the case. Different yes, but better is up for interpretation. It continued to be a struggle for us to settle into this home and make it feel truly ours... and I suppose some days that struggle continues but I do see the light emerging in that respect. It is certainly slow coming but after one full year here it is getting easier to find all the things we love about our new location, surroundings and neighborhood.

Most of our painful lessons I did not even write about this year, and probably contributed to me not writing much at all. I of course did note the passing of David's beloved Grandmother but I did not write much about the six months prior to her death. I didn't talk about her battle with cancer or about our continued personal emotional battle his other loved ones during her last months. Some of it might be due to the complexity of it all, or perhaps the amount of pain that was involved with all of it.

It continues to this day to one of our hardest life lessons but both David and I try to trust daily in the fact that it will serve us in some way, in some time... hopefully soon. We know in our heads that the sooner we can see that blessing in disguise the sooner the healing will begin in our hearts. I guess maybe that is why during some of our darkest hours while we are sorting through all of the sludge of emotions we are givin very obvious and joyous blessings to help us along.

It is certainly not ever over looked for one minute that this beautiful year brought us the gift of the new little life growing within me. We hold onto that and are oh so thankful after all we have been through that we can still receive such perfect sparks of this universe. It definitely gives new meaning to taking the bitter with the sweet, which I will be trying to balance within myself in this next year to come.